Compulsion!!!

This afternoon, again and again. he reminded me with 8 graduation requirement that everyday be a conversation between teachers in every class. I always looked down or close my ears and don't want to discuss it with others. I am tired. During this time, I feel it all as a my future friend that will realize my dreams but why now he continued to demand me, so that I felt the terms that would lead me to the darkest abyss. This makes me, sometimes, hates school and himself. To think about the national exam just like this.  and now they continue to demand the other exams. I got to thinking that requirement is a burden but I don't want to think like that. They just frighten me.

I tried as hard as possible be separated from that mind but this month, I  just refreshed my mind. And suddenly, the Thunder grabbed my mind. they reminded me about it again and increasingly pressuring me. Scare me. I wonder what they are thinking but I'm just telling the truth. He made this heart had doubts " Am I  able finish the 8 requirements that?". it was like a force but also frightened. Perhaps, if he saw me in the back row, I'm weeping for myself. Am I able to get through all of this after his words have changed patterns of thought about the  8 requirements. Enough, I don't want to hear those words again. I have  been  remembered and understand it in my mind. Now, let me finish it in my own way.

I tell it all in front of my mom, that same afternoon. She was a woman who can melt my icy heart. With warm words. She swept the dirt in my mind, although not all. "Pray! They just scare you. Believe in yourself! Trying hard! Say Bismillah and La Hawla Wala Quwwata! Do it! I ever experienced it. You must get past this hurdle." I just silent. At times like this, she who I need. I will always remember her words, although not all of them make me relieved. I will restore the requirement to be my future friend. Not the enemy of evil but it is the enemy of the good.